Just wanted to make a quick to note to bring something to everyone’s attention…

These are by Givenchy.
They cost $165.
They’re made of plastic.

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How on Earth did headbands come back into style? Particularly gaudy, glittery headbands like this one that Nicole Richie is wearing. She’s about two steps away from wearing gold wrist bands and carrying the lasso of truth. I’m not sure what the leather sarong is all about… Is this what biker sluts wear to the beach?

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Dear Rachel Bilson,

You have fantastic legs. Those fantastic legs sit atop a nice pair of thin ankles that any girl should be more than willing to show off. You even do that sometimes, and man, do you ever look good when you do. So, you can understand why I get a little flustered when I see you walking around in these:

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The gladiator trend is exploding. Thus, it only makes sense for Tyra Banks to jump on board and whore it out just a little bit more:

This is the first promo shot for America’s Next Top Model cycle 11. Ty Ty went with a hippie-dippie flower child theme - some kind of high fashion production of Hair, only the blissed out stoners are replaced by catty gay men. It says “Feel the Love” on the top, but you just know Jay Manuel and Tyra want to claw eachother’s botoxed eyes out.

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Here’s the lesser of two evils, Nicky Hilton, at Barney’s the other day. The bag-like dress hanging off her twiggy frame isn’t really doing it for me, but I’m just happy I’m not looking at Paris. I sometimes forget about Nicky. I imagine it must get cold and lonely in the shadow of Paris’ overwhelming sluttery and skankeration.

Apparently Nicky is a fashion designer now - which seems to be the chosen profession of useless, spoiled rich girls (Lauren Conrad and Heidi Montag, I’m looking in your direction). I hope this bag-dress-fedora combination isn’t walking down her runway, but I do like the Steve Madden sandals on her feet. Nicky’s wearing the Steven by Steve Madden “Banglez” gladiator sandal. These sandals feature trendy stud details, similar to the popular Balenciaga studded gladiators - but for far less bucks.

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Fergie shows off her gladiators, and some ass cheek

Fergie took the stage the other night to shake her fergilicious ass in a pair of shorts that many have referred to as “mom shorts” - however, I think they can only be classified as that if your mom is Pamela Anderson. I mean, sure, they go up to her boobs, but they only cover about half her ass. I actually did have a friend who’s mother wore shorts like these. Her name was Candy and her breath smelled like tequila and beer.

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Case study #1: Kim Kardashian

Here’s bootylicious socialite Kim Kardashian at the Matt Leinart 2008 Annual Celebrity Bowling Night in Hollywood the other night. Kim’s wearing a pair of cute white peep toes with her outfit. I think the shoes are great, but why did she feel the need to tie the ankle strap over her jeans? I’ve seen this done before (Sienna Miller, I’m looking in your direction) and everytime, it looks horrible. Everything looks messy and bunched up, and Kim is waaaaaaaaay too pretty for that.

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Why does today’s gladiator trend demand that everyone’s legs look like they’re in bondage?

Here’s MK Olsen leaving her boyfriend’s house wearing a pair of gladiators by Chanel. I don’t think I’d wear a pair of these, but I will say that MK does pull them off. They go hand in hand with her unique style. I still have visions of whips and chains and dominatrices in my head when I look at them. Perhaps it’s just visions of my true life calling.

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Many major designers and fashion houses have jumped on the gladiator trend, including Giuseppe Zanotti, Dolce Vita and Balenciaga. Givenchy designed a captivating gladiator style bootie, that we’ve seen on Heidi Montag and Cassie, just to name a few. Today I stumbled upon these from Givenchy, which seems to be their answer to the Balenciaga full-blown gladiator boot:

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Shauna says, “Bow down before your lucite queen!”

I get the impression that Shauna Sand might be into bondage. Or at least her legs are.

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Lindsay Lohan turned the big twenty-two yesterday. If you felt the Earth vibrate last night, it was probably the vibrational fallout from this party girl’s shindig. I was going to send her a present, but apparently they don’t let you send a cocaine and adderall in the mail.

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I’m not a huge fan of this gladiator trend. This is why:

I’m fairly confident that Caligula never wore boots like these.

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