It took me a little while to figure out what was going on in this picture. At first, I thought Lady Gaga lost a bit of her weave and it was caught on her shoes. Then I thought that maybe it was part of a giant ponytail (I know a giant ponytail sounds stupid, but this is a woman who wore a lobster on her head, so anything’s possible). Eventually, I realized that, in actuality, Lady Gaga’s boots have their own weave. Of course they do! Why wouldn’t you want fake hair streaming down your calves, tripping you as you walk and picking up every stray piece of chewed gum you walk over? It’s just, y’know – screw this, I can’t even joke about it anymore. YOUR BOOTS HAVE HAIR, GAGA. Blond hair, with roots, like it was ripped out of Britney’s weave while she was looking the other way, drooling over a frappuccino. It’s not artistic, it’s stupid. And ugly. Go back to the lobster hat. To your boots I say, get a hair cut, ya hippie.
Gaga’s boots also feature a split toe, which leads me to believe they’re probably by Maison Martin Margiela. I hate these boots. They make everyone (especially Sarah Jessica Parker) look like a horse, or centaur, or some kind of earthly manifestation of Lucifer himself. TOES ARE NOT SEXY. This is why we wear shoes. Thoughts?
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Very funny !