Slouch.

Such an ugly word. Kind of like ‘Ugg‘. Or as I choose to pronounce it, “Ugh!”

These Uggs are knit, rather than suede or sheep’s skin, giving them a slouchy look.

I’ve never quite understood the whole slouch thing. It didn’t work in 1987 and it’s not working now. The words ’slouch’ and ’style’ do not belong together, nor do the words ’slouch’ and ‘boot’ or ‘Ugg’ and ‘fashionable’.

To call something “slouchy” implies that it is saggy, droopy and unformed. Does that sound attractive to you?

When I see these boots, I feel like the mother of some young, tortured emo kid. I just want to tell them to stop moping and stand up straight.

I should warn you, I’m taking on the big powers that be, here. Oprah recently promoted these boots as one of her favourite things of 2007. Now, I don’t want to piss off the O, but apparently, some of Oprah’s favourite things are cankles.

I would be driven nuts by these slouchy things drooping around my calves. I want to say they’re warm, but shouldn’t a boot be snug to properly insulate against the cold? If anyone has these boots, let me know.

You know what? Boots like these may actually come in handy. Possibly for some kind of knit moccasin shortage, going on the Oprah Winfrey show, or smuggling small items across the border.

So, in closing, I may not be a famous talk show host with massive reach and influence (yet) but I think the slouch Ugg has taken the Ugg to uglier and the ’slouch’ to even further depths of fashion hell.

Tags: boots, cankles, oprah, slouch boots, ugg

Posted: Nov 24th, 2007 at 3:51 am